I'll Hold You A Little Bit More
by YueSoEul
Summary: I love you, but would that be enough to keep you?


I've promised myself that I would not write another pure aghast if I could help it. Okay, I really can't help it. I was listening to Infinite's Paradise and the idea just came flooding in. **One-shot**!

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Yi Jeong exhaled heavily as he gathered Ga Eul closer to him. It was comfortable, being near her, being with her. She made it really easy; to love her had been the easiest thing in the world for him. He loved it, the feeling of which he felt whenever she was around, close to him. He watched her looking effortlessly beautiful lying in his arms. Her eyes were fixed on the television screen, now and then her body would shake and that musical laugh would fill the space, gracing his ear. He wanted to stay like that forever, if he could. He wanted to be just with her if he could. He really would, life would have been easier for the both of them if he could.

A sudden ringing sound startled the both of them. Quickly, Yi Jeong moved to reach for the cellphone that was lying on the table before them. His expression turned sour the moment he saw the name flashing on the screen. He threw the cellphone back onto the table after pressing the cancel button. He doesn't need to answer it, no; he was not obligated to answer it. "Why don't you answer it?" Ga Eul asked as she titled her head to face Yi Jeong's. She had caught the name of the caller before Yi Jeong picked the cellphone off of the table. "It can wait," Yi Jeong replied indifferently, pulling Ga Eul even closer. He doesn't want to ruin the evening with unnecessary drama; he was just enjoying the comfort of her body pressed close to him.

"Sunbae..." Ga Eul's voice trailed sadly. Slowly, she broke free from his arms before he could tighten his hold around her. Sitting up, Ga Eul's gaze fell onto Yi Jeong's face. Yi Jeong hated it, the sadness that was apparent in her eyes; he wanted to go back to a minute ago, a minute ago when there were just the two of them. "You shouldn't ignore your wife..." She added, barely a whisper and Yi Jeong could feel that tugging pain that was enveloping his very soul. He was unable to speak; his gaze was fixed on Ga Eul, watching her calm expression, it was as if she wasn't even hurt by the statement that just fell from her own lips.

Yi Jeong could only swallow hard. "Ga Eul..." He stated after a while, calling out her name. There was no happy ending for them. There was no epic love story for them. Nothing like of which Jan Di and Jun Pyo had. Sure, he had kept his promise; she was the first person he went to see upon his return. That was just it, which was the only thing he could do. It wasn't as if he didn't fight for her, he did. God knows he fought with everything he had. He did everything he could. Even so, he had no choice. That day when he stood saying 'I do', she wasn't the one who was standing beside him; she was sitting among their friends, looking as breathtakingly beautiful as she could be. How he wish she was the one saying 'I do' to him. He was just not as brave as Gu Jun Pyo.

He wanted it, badly, the life where she would be in it, the life of which when he could always see her smile. He wanted to give her everything. Sitting there, with her, and looking at the loving look in her eyes, he wanted that more than anything. "I guess you're not staying for dinner then," Ga Eul stated easily and he could feel how his heart was breaking yet again. He watched a smile formed on her face as she got up from her seat, turning off the television as she did. He watched her walked towards the kitchen, pulling and putting away things. He was frozen in place. He doesn't deserve her, God knows he doesn't deserve her at all, but, he wanted to be greedy, he wanted her in his life. Without her, he knew well enough, his world would be empty.

Slowly, yet surely, he rose from his seat, joining her in the kitchen. As soon as he found her, he allowed himself to encircle his arms around her waist easily; he felt her jump before leaning back to him comfortably. "No, I'm staying the night," Yi Jeong stated, planting a soft kiss on Ga Eul's shoulder. He felt her nod as he held her closer. "I love you," He stated before releasing her, but received no respond as he watched her busy herself with preparing the food. He would trade everything, for a moment with her; he would even sell his soul to the devil.

"Sunbae," Ga Eul murmured, leaning closer into Yi Jeong. "Hmm..." He replied easily, tracing small kisses on her bare shoulder. "We should stop this," She stated mournfully, but there was conviction in her voice as well. Yi Jeong stopped in his track, raising his face to met Ga Eul's gaze. He was startled to find traces of tears threatening to break. "No..." He stated easily. No, he cannot, will no, let her go. Sure, he was greedy for making her stay when he knew very well he had nothing to offer to her. "No," He repeated, gathering her into his arms, pulling her even closer.

"If you love me, you have to let me go," Ga Eul's voice was barely a whisper. She could only bit her bottom lip, trying to hold in the tears that were building. Yi Jeong was taken aback. His hold onto Ga Eul loosened, he turned her to face him by which time tears had fallen to her cheek, leaving its trace. "I can't..." He admitted. "I can't," He repeated as tears fell from his own eyes. "Stay, just stay with me, I can't live without you by my side," He added, caressing Ga Eul's cheek lightly, brushing her tears away in the process. "I can't," Ga Eul replied, as tears continued to fall. "I can't or I would surely break," She added, her voice was barely audible but it was clear as the day for Yi Jeong. Lost for words, he pulled Ga Eul into his arms again.

"Do you have your ticket?" Jan Di asked worriedly, shuffling through her bag to calm her nerves, around her the crowd are more at a bustling speed. A soft hand rested on her forearm, stopping her dead in her tracks. "Jan Di-ah..." Ga Eul's voice graced her ears as Jan Di looked up to meet her friend's warm gaze. "Thank you," Ga Eul stated slowly, a smile formed on her lips as she uttered the words. Washed by a wave of emotion, Jan Di had to bit back her tongue to stop herself from crying as she pulled her friend into a hug. "You have to be happy, alright," She mumbled into her friend's hair. "You have to be really happy," She added as tears finally betrayed her.

Yi Jeong sat lazily in his chair, staring out of the window. He was nursing a glass of whiskey in his left hand. On the side table, a purple coloured note smelling of lavender rested. He watched the clouds passed, he watched how the skies changed as it did. She was gone, she was out of his life and the only thing she left was a letter and her scent which will forever linger in his mind.

_I'm letting you go because I love you. Live well and be happy Sunbae, I'll always love you._

_- Ga Eul_

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Originally published on "Lovers Unparalleled" 2nd October 2011


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